So How Do You Make a Baby Again?????

You put the guy's thingy in the girl's thingy, and presto: Instant little human!!! Movies and TV make it seem that easy, but I don't think it is. On this blog there are baby clothes, a crib, and baby toys, so one might ask, "Is Leah pregnant?!!?!" Well...the answer is NO for those inquiring minds.

However, we HAVE been doing some research.

One of the only truly heated discussions Leah and I have had during our almost 3 years of marriage, was the issue of adoption. I am not against adoption at all, but my basic stance was: if we couldn't have children the old fashioned way, I would consider adoption because at the root of it all....I want to be a father. Those of you that have known Leah, or read about her on her various blogs, you know by now that she has some pretty big health issues--fibromyalgia being a tough one. She does not (or did not) think that her body could handle the rigors of being pregnant. (Of all the research I have done, I have found that for 99% of the female population, being preggers ain't a Sunday afternoon stroll.) I have to give my wife so much credit because she has decided with me to give it a try the "old fashioned way."

Now comes the hard part.....

(By the way, this is going to be long, so please feel free to excuse yourself and grab your favorite snack item.)

Enter more research and health class information.

So here is the deal. The best time to conceive a child is when the woman is ovulating: Leah's got an egg and it is waiting to hook up with one of my little fellows. Most women ovulate 10 or so days after their period has ended. Hence first issue. Leah is on her period anywhere from 24-35 days. RED FLAG. THAT AIN'T NORMAL! She went to visit the "lady doctor" to be like, "ummm got some problems goin on down there," and it turns out she has Polysystic Ovarian Syndrome. So she produces an egg, but then it multiplies into cysts (preventing her from being fertilized by one of my playa's) and then she bleeds forever! Now there are 2 options for this syndrome: 1) Take birth control to regulate hormones (baby makin not an option) or 2) Take another type of pill to regulate the period and start ovulation. Which door did they choose Alex??? We went with #2. Again, mad props to my wifey, because one of the side effects is nausea and for the first month she was not feeling in the best of sorts. Her bleeding has stopped, but she has not had a period yet. Who knew there was so much going on down there that could go wrong!? I mean, with guys it is easy. Hmmmm, its purple....see doctor.....hurts when I pee.....see doctor....can't find it......probably see doctor. Anyway, the point is that Leah is undergoing "under the hood maintenance" so we can try for futurebaby.

(Why don't I use the correct scientific terms for this process? People, this is entertainment. Plus, I know my Mom reads this.)

Speaking of my mom. Leah was wondering why I have not told my mother all of these things? She has told friends and family that we are in fact T.R.Y.I.N.G. I don't have a good answer for that. I guess that I am a big fan of surprises, so I wanted to be on the phone one Sunday and say, "Hey mom, by the way, Leah and I are pregnant!" I love surprises! I also think part of it is that I have always been a reserved person who does not talk to people about feelings, and things, in my life, you know......Typical male traits (I also drink beer and obsess about football.) I have always wanted to know about other people, listen to other people, and make other people happy, and I think part of me doesn't want to talk about this because I don't want to let people in, and also I think making other people happier means more (perhaps I should see a psychologist about this stuff?) I also think part of me doesn't think it will be easy, something will go wrong--maybe drastically wrong. It may be a deep-seeded pessimism I have with many things, but I don't want to imagine some of the hardships that my parents went through. Did my parents survive? Yes, they have two healthy, tall, and incredibly good looking sons (heh heh). I guess I would rather tell my parents once I knew everything was going OK, healthy, and running smooth. Now the cat is out of the bag, and we are "trying" officially (because I have typed this). To my mother who I know is reading this, "You know I have always been better with writing words than saying them, so I hope you understand. I love you, and ELBOWS to dad."

So, the best part.....getting to try to make a baby!! As everyone knows, being the male in conceiving is pretty easy and awesome. I am all for practicing as much as we can and as often as we can. When you think about your parents it always comes down to the same equation...."Honeymoon + Child #1 + Child #2 + repeat for the # of children = # of times parents have had sex." I know that isn't true, but I think most kids like to think so. I have told Leah we can practice as much as she would like, because I am committed to do my part. Which I alluded to above was easy and fun :)

So I am sure now that the secret is out that Leah will be filling everyone else in on the specifics and the everyday life of a married couple trying to start a family.

But the best part is......

Starting a family with....